A Lady is going to Italy for some work and her husband comes to drop her at the Airport. She asks him "Do you want any present from Italy?" He says in a cheeky tone " Ya bring me a hot Italian girl if you can" After a month when he comes to pick her up. He agian asks "Didn't you bring my present" And the wife replies " Oh! honey how could I forget that I tried my best but a girl or a boy I don't know for that you will have to wait 9 MONTHS!"
A Tour in England
A tour bus full of American tourists arrives at Runnymede, England. They gather around the tour guide who says, "This is the spot where the barons forced King John to sign the Magna Carta." A man pushing his way to the front of the crowd asks, "When did that happen?" "1215," answers the guide. The man looks at his watch and says, "Shooot! Just missed it by a half hour!"
In the Classroom
"Sometimes, when I'm in class, I dream that I'm on a tropical island, sitting under a huge palm tree, with some soft gentle music being played on some traditional wood instruments of that region, and a cool gentle breeze caressing my tanned body. Of course, it would be so much easier without everyone yelling at me to keep teaching."